She-nannigan's. Chicago, Illinois

16 West Division Street

Guinness Tag: $6.25 | Overall Rating: 2.25

Today's Dedicated Pint: Dolly Parton

I typically always get a rush of dopamine whenever I walk through a new Irish Pub's door and sit down at the bar. She-nnanigan's sucked all the excitement out of my body and threw it in the trash. It sits right next door to perhaps Chicago's best Irish Pub, Butch McGuire's, and it sits across the street from The Lodge, a very cozy Irish Pub. It has impeccable competition everywhere you look on the block.

The owners of the place actually own The Lodge across the street as well as a really fun and notorious Piano Bar downtown called The Red Head. I've been to The Red Head Piano Bar many times, actually, as I used to live here in my past life. I suppose the owners desired having a place like She-Nanni's under their umbrella for whatever reason (I'm sure it's a total cash cow at the end of the day).

This is a nightclub. Don't come into this place if you're looking for a friendly sit down with a couple of friends (do that next door). As soon as you walk in you are embraced with the giant dance floor, DJ lights, and the smell of puke from last night's shenanigans. There's also a Beer-Pong table right in front of the stage. It was set up and ready to go as well at perhaps 4 pm in the afternoon. I understand that every demographic needs to be catered to and that there's a lot of money in this part of the industry. There's nothing wrong with having a night club. Although, there's nothing anyone can do or say about it; a nightclub could never get a good rating in the "Irish Pub" world if you ask me. However, if you're Irish and you're a bar then I'm making a presence regardless.

Don't get things twisted, we still had a good time as always. I'm not some bitter old man who's asking for the volume to be turned down. I'm a mascot for Major League Baseball; I'm no stranger to big crowds, loud music, screaming idiots, and dancing. I can embrace it at times, although I don't really want to.

The bartenders weren't that bad, although our main bartender threw me a curveball. I don't know if she was trying to feck' with us or was just indeed a weirdo. I asked her about her favorite bars in the area, and she recommended a bar inside Jewel Osco nearby. Jewel Osco is a grocery store. It's not that I didn't believe her that a bar can exist inside a grocery store because the grocery stores around my house actually do (Jungle Jim's is my favorite). I looked it up and sure enough, there is a bar inside of a Jewel Osco down the street. Although, for a grocery store bar to be the number one bar that pops into your head when you think of your favorite spots around? That's weird, right? Maybe she just wanted us to actually go and waste an hour's worth of time, perhaps she'd get a kick out of knowing that she's responsible for us wasting our time at a grocery store? If that's the case then it doesn't make the recommendation as weird, but it's still weird, and I don't think that's the case either. Her Guinness pour is pretty weak, too, unfortunately.

If you're sitting at the bar to the left as you walk in, and you look up to the ceiling near the window, you'll find one of those cheesy police sirens/lights. I don't know why but I think it's funny. Has anyone in the history of drinking at a bar ever said "yeah I like the place, but you know what it's missing? One of those cheap, blue lights that make you feel like you're getting pulled over by the cops."

There are a few things that I can say that I like about the place. I enjoyed the bathrooms. I enjoyed the old Budweiser sign. I'm always a sucker for Christmas colors and She-Nanni's has them. If you notice, a lot of Pubs that tickle my fancy right away are those who shine green, red, and blue colors (Patrick O'Shea's, The Full Shilling, The Drunken Mallard). I also enjoyed sitting under these ceiling tiles; they ain't too shabby.

Any more time spent on this place would be wasteful. Don't come here unless you're looking to party really hard. Sorry She-Nannigan's, but just because you're not my cup of tea that doesn't mean we can't be friends, right? Slainte!

A toiletry